Day 18: Learning to See




“Jesus said to them, ‘Why are you talking about having no bread? Do you still not perceive or understand? Are your hearts hardened? Do you have eyes, and fail to see? Do you have ears, and fail to hear? And do you not remember?"
~Mark 8:17-18



Learning to See” by Kathy Murphy
Using a hands-on approach, I teach higher level math to very young children.  Many of the kids are smart enough to just look and “see” the answer to the problems at the beginning. I stress it is the process that matters - they must learn HOW to solve the problem and to do that they must follow the directions. But the kids are more concerned with the end and bypass the process. “I got it”, they yell. My students think they know what they are doing and think they have the situation under control. Later when they encounter a more complex equation – they are shocked and scared to find they don’t have a clue what to do. As I reflect, I find my journey as a disciple is much like my students and their math. 

Jesus lays it all out in the Gospels. He tells us what He expects. He models how we should live. The Holy Spirit comes to guide us. But much like my students, I was yelling “I got it” early in my journey.

I was born into a loving, Christian family and always in relationship with the Lord.  I thought I understood what it meant to walk with Christ. I believed, had faith, went to church and followed the rules. I worked hard to be a good girl.  Foolishly I thought I got it.

In mid-life my world fell apart. I was in despair. I discovered no matter what I did – no matter how hard I tried – I couldn’t make things right.  It was then, brought to my knees by life, that I finally began to follow Jesus’ directions - to do things His way – to work through the process of becoming a disciple.

I put my focus on Christ. I purposefully set aside time each day to spend in Bible Study and in Prayer. Even though my burdens did not go away, life was different. I had my “aha” moment – Life, even my life, was not about me!

Years later I find that most days bring a new challenge. I have to consciously decide to pick up my cross and follow. But just as Jesus promised, He is here with me to help.  His closeness has held me up through some very difficult times.

Like my students, I thought I got it. It was not until I followed the process - The Lord’s directions - that I truly began my Journey to the Cross. Christ’s way – the way full of peace and joy - is what sustains me now through good times and bad.







Prayer:
Open my eyes, Lord, to the work you have placed around me.
Help me to put aside my wants and focus on others’ needs.
Help me to love my neighbor enough to realize their pain. Show me how to help.
Please, Lord, open my eyes.




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